Stormy Sky

Stormy Sky
When I Walk Through The Shadow Of Death I Shall Not Fear

Wednesday, 18 October 2017

Do What Matters Be Different Than Other People

Luke 9:23-27;  1 Peter 2: 11-12; Phillipians 2:14-16

Today the question in my bible study is what do I have to let go of to be able to pick up Jesus cross.

1)  Don't get upset or run when people, especially Christians who hurt me.
2) Don't put Christians up on a pedestal,  they are human and will do things that hurt.
3) Stay where God puts me and don't wish I was elsewhere.
4)  Create my own pottery. don't do what others do just because they are selling more than me.
5) Don't worry, especially about getting things done, such as Doreen's sewing projects.
6) Love people and don't see what I consider their flaw. Or don't judge people. Don't worry about their growth in Christ, only mine.  We are all on a different path.

To grow in Jesus I must get rid of my sins or junk.

I see myself walking on a path with Jesus ahead.  There are many trails that go off this path.  They look enticing, inviting, but if I take them I will not be following Jesus.  Other times the path is a narily tangled bush with brambles that can trip me up and I can't see where I am going.  I have to know that Jesus is just ahead of me clearing the path for me.  Then there are times with I am up on the mountaintop
or at the ocean when I can see a long way off.  I would like to experience more of those times then the twisted mess of the trail.  I must realize that following Jesus gives us both.

I choose to follow Jesus no matter what.

Dear Father in heaven, I lay all these burdens down at the foot of the cross.  I need your help here for these sins have been with me most of my life and are not easy to lay down.

Wednesday, 12 July 2017

Trust God

The last few years have been a mild roller coaster.  Great times with some down times. 

All this time I keep getting "trust God, I am not following God, etc."

This morning I was wondering how am I not trusting God and how do I trust Him.  I thought that I did.

I have been finishing one of Doreen's quilts, a Victorian embroidery quilt.  I love the way it is turning out. I either finished or started the panels Doreen didn't finish, embroidering what I like.  One day I saw a binder I tucked in with the sewing machine books, from Doreen's. It was the pattern for the quilt and other patterns, such as the vest I finished in March.  

One panel is a rectangle instead of square. I had been trying to incorporate it in the quilt.  It only had a ribbon on it. It turns out it is part of a pillow sham the width of the bed. The last quilt panel in the center of the quilt is twice the size of the others. Doreen hadn't cut this one out yet, nor any of the border pieces. I like the layout of the panels better than what I was planning on doing.  

Last night I was going to continue adding embroidery to the rectangle pillow sham piece.  On the pattern were many flowers, which I don't have the design for.  I found another flower which might work.  Then I thought no, I will go back to my own design and not follow the pattern.  

This morning when I asked God how am I not following Him, trying to follow the sham pattern instead of my heart is what I have been doing wrong.  I need to, in all things, follow my heart, not someone else's pattern.  If I don't like it, it is not me, or how God designed me.  I need to enjoy and be happy with what I am doing.  

Following God is not hard.  When I follow my heart, my desires, I am following God, for He created me to be me not someone else.  I am much better at this than I used to be, but old habits die hard and too many people in my life, mostly Christians had controlled me. 

No more, hosah!  

Wednesday, 15 February 2017

Made To Crave - Temtations

Day 11.  I missed a few days while taking care of my grandchildren.  I will put those at the end.

The author, Lysa Terkeurst, of this devotion she struggles with weight.  It was her anniversary and they gave her a large piece of her favorite cake.  She was tempted to eat it but passed it to her husband.  Then she had a pity party and thought 'this is not fare.  She recognized this as the enemy taking advantage of her weakness.

My weakness it to feel I have been left out and not included.  It is just not fair that they get to have that or do this etc.  Satan grabs me with these insecure feelings. At these times of my pity party I focus on the negative instead of the positive which is seeing all the blessings God has given me.

I need to recognize that when I feel this way to go to God's truth, that He has not forgotten me nor abandoned me.  He will always have my back and it is his timing, not mine.  It is by His strength I can do what God has called me to do.  

Matthew 19: 26 Jesus looked hard at the and said, "No chance at al if you think you can pull it off yourself.  Every chance in the world if you trust God to do it. 

Friday, 3 February 2017

Made To Crave - You Were Created For More

 People get knocked down in life and develop a feeling of shame, feel inadequate, we are just not good enough.

 My inadequacy was low self-esteem.  I am not good enough, smart enough, just can't do it good enough.  Fortunately, God has healed most of these in me as I am on his path from glory to glory.

These feelings of insecurity came from my childhood. The church my parents attended did not teach the truth therefore, the lies came in.  Don't compliment your children, they will become conceded. Criticize and tear down instead.

I was very unhealthy as a baby and it took me 3 years to learn to walk or talk.  A social worker who saw me once told Mom I was mentally retarded.  Mom believed this and every time I didn't succeed she told me it was because I was supposed to be mentally retarded.  I grew up believing I was worthless and the dumbest person around.  I believed that if I could do something then everyone else could do it too.  

For many years God kept telling me I was worth more.  He put on my heart Jeremiah 29:11  I know what I am doing. I have it all planned out - plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.  

 When I was growing up I had a desire to own my own business.  That was how I was going to make money.  I haven't made money that way, I married a husband who did that for me. But  I do have my own business.  I make artistic pottery and enjoy doing it. 

It was a long road of God healing me and speaking truth instead of lies into me, but God did keep His promise as long as I was willing to follow him.

I was created for more. 

Made To Crave - Overweight Physically - Underweight Spiritually

Matthew 19 20-21 A rich man came to Jesus and asked him how he could enter the kingdom of heaven.  He followed all the rules and in his eyes was a good person.  Jesus told him to sell everything, then follow Jesus.  He couldn't submit his riches and walked away. Money was his god.

Overweight is definitely a problem for many people, but that is not the issue here.  The question is 'what is more important to me than following God?'.

I try to protect me from people who will hurt me.  I don't like being hurt, verbally because too many loved ones have hurt me.  I run and hide from people.  I don't trust God to love me past the hurts. The god I worship tries to protect myself by running and hiding.  

I need to keep in mind that everyone who has hurt me is a hurting person.  Recently I was telling a person that she never asked me the truth about the situation I was in.  Instead, she went to my husband, who didn't know the complete truth of this situation, and he told her something else.  She told me she didn't ask me because of the reaction I might have.  It might not be favorable. This hurt me because she saw me like this and she was right, so I left the church service, I ran and hid.  Then  I realized she was doing the same thing I did.  She was afraid to talk to me because she didn't want to get hurt.  Her god was the same one I had, protect ourselves so we don't get hurt.

I am not the only one who has these insecurities, but I have a choice to be better than these people, by loving them unconditionally,

Wednesday, 1 February 2017

Made To Crave - Undivided Heart

Sunday sermon was the famous bible story of David and Goliath.  Our pastor focused on why did Dave want to slay the giant. Perhaps because he wanted to save Israelite, but he asked 3 times what Saul would give to the person who slew the giant - wealth, tax-free life and his daughter.  David like most of us had ulterior motives.

Today I began a 21-day bible study called Crave by Lysa Terkeurst, president of Proverbs 31 Ministries.

Lysa talked about her craving food instead of God. She ate to satisfy the battle of lack of love that raged in her heart.  Food is not my problem, but I do crave something else due to a battle of lack of love raging in my heart.

Psalms 139 tells us that God fearfully created us and we are wonderfully made.  It doesn't say anywhere that we need to shape up first before we are loved, which humans often imply to us.

When I encounter a person who criticizes me or bosses me I take offense and want to run away. I feel I am not loved unless I shape up first.  If I hurt back or run away I am telling them, 'I won't love you until you stop hurting me'. I need to love those people and realize that they are acting in a hurtful way because they are not intentionally hurting me. This is the way they have always acted, they are blinded to their sin. In order to not take offense, I need to walk in the spirit and hear God's voice to have an undivided heart when I am talking to people. My motive in talking to people needs to be to love them unconditionally, not to get a favorable response back from them. 

This is a weak spot for me but God is my strength. 
My grace is enough; it’s all you need.
My strength comes into its own in your weakness.
2 Corinthians 12:9 The Message

Wednesday, 25 January 2017

Faith To Hear God's Small Voice, Not The Clanging Noise Of People.

Luke 17: 5-6 The Message Bible
The apostle came up and said to the Master, "Give us more faith."
But the Master said, "You don't need more faith. There is no 'more' or 'less' faith.  If you have a bare kernel of faith, say the size of a poppy seed, you could say to this sycamore tree, 'Go jump in the lake, and it would do it.

My job as a believer in Jesus Christ is to have faith, to believe.  For 8 years I believed God would heal the bipolar I suffered from and he did.  I watched my leg grow 1/2" as a result of a prayer.  Many times God has rescued me from despair and healed many of my chronic diseases, yet I still doubt at times.

Why is that?  My problem comes, not from not having enough faith, for Jesus said you don't need more.  It is when I have no faith and I don't trust or believe God.  That is when I listen to people, even well-meaning Christians who unintentionally say things that bring me down to their level.   I need to listen to God and have faith He will tell me the truth.

Recently this happened at church. A lady, whom I always kept a safe distance from, was telling me to do something I didn't want to do.  I was so upset I left the church and didn't want to come back.  The next day God gave me Luke 1:17,  Don't let the bullies stop you for doing my work. That is why I keep my distance from her, she bosses me.   If I was listening to God when she was doing this instead of getting hurt, God would have told me she was bullying me then and I would have stayed at church.

Faith to hear God's small voice and not the clanging noise of people. 

We are all on a path towards God, some make it some don't.  I must not be concerned what others think or say about me, that is their path.  I need to keep pressing forward towards the goal of my own path.  To continue to believe that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.